Hugh: All right Test kids, It’s your mother’s Birthday, and we’re gonna make it extra-special with a super surprise breakfast and fashion-appropriate gifts.
Susan: Try to get her a good birthday present this year Dad.
Mary: Not like last year’s Inappropriate jackhammer.
Hugh: It was on sale and an excellent value.
Johnny: I think she wants a new dining room.
Hugh: What makes you say that?
Johnny: She left catalogs all over the house with pictures of it and sticky notes saying… I want this for my birthday
Hugh: I can fix that and dining room tables cost more than $43.87 and the birthday budget says that’s all I’m allowed to spend, now Susan and Mary you make the surprise breakfast while I go gift shopping.
Johnny: Wait what’s my birthday job?
Hugh: The most important job of all, sitting here and making sure she doesn’t ruin her birthday surprise like she does every year by coming downstairs before we’re ready.
Johnny: I’m on birthday guard duty?
Hugh: Do not let your mother leave this room until everything is perfect.
Johnny: But I wanted to make mom my special Johnny cakes for breakfast
Susan: We’ll trade with you, we hate cooking.
Mary: But we make great birthday surprise security guards.
Dukey: Cool uniforms and what’s a Johnny cake?
Johnny: I have no Idea but let’s start cookin dog, so after adding all this junk I dump in a little red gush for that extra kick stir it up then you have the batter for my special birthday Johnny cakes.
Dukey: Um pancake batter isn’t supposed to walk away like that.
Johnny: Yep I need help.
Lila: Oh! It’s my Birthday, I wonder what surprises my family has… in store… for me.
Susan: Stop right there Mom.
Mary: You’re on Birthday surprise lockdown until we’re ready for you.
Lila: I can’t wait, did your Father get the dining room set, are you making me pancakes, just let me through.
Johnny: Johnny Cakes, walk away, need help.
Mary: It’s just breakfast Johnny.
Susan: And you wanted to make it, so you do your job and we’ll do ours.
Lila: Did somebody say breakfast, what are you making sweetheart?
Johnny: You’re right sisters, I need to make breakfast on my own thanks.
Dukey: You took their keys didn’t you?
Johnny: Shbingo! Now to press this happy button here and…
Construction Drones: What can we build for you?
Dukey: You’re gonna use the Construction Drones?
Johnny: They’re gonna to construct a better Birthday Breakfast than me. Awesome!!
Hugh: Hi. This dining room set is a bit out of my price range. But how much, say, for one chair? 30 bucks?
Dining Room Employee: No.
Hugh: How much are the chair cushions?
Lila: Aha! I picked the lock.
Susan: Aha! I added high-voltage security lasers.
Lila: Ahaha! I’ll use the windows.
Mary: Happy Birthday, Mom.
Chef Drone Leader: Would you like the Parisian Croissant Breakfast or the morning Summer Grapefruit Breakfast?
Johnny: It’s for my Mom’s Birthday. And it has to be the biggest fattest tastiest you can make. I’m talking The Ultimate Taste-Splosion Lumberjack Surprise Birthday Breakfast!
Chef Drone Leader: One Lumberjacks Birthday Surprise Breakfast coming up in…
Chef Drones: Three… Two… One.
Johnny: DAAAAAAAAA
Dukey: WAAAAAAAAA
Johnny: Yeah, I think he used too much batter.
Dukey: Um, your Dad liked a yard of Pancakes, right?
Johnny: Where’s the dining set? Don’t look at the lawn.
Hugh: I got her something better and cheaper. The Super-Absorbent Shammie Wammie. Watch!
Johnny: You got her a cleaning thing for her Birthday?
Hugh: I’M BAD AT GIFT SHOPPING. I’ll go exchange this for something different. And is that A GIGANTIC PANCAKE?
Johnny: I traded jobs with Susan and Mary. That one’s just practice.
Hugh: Clean it up! And I don’t care who makes the Breakfast, but it has to be perfect, and ready by the time I get back with a perfect gift that your Mother will love.
Johnny: You guys have to get rid of that Giant Pancake. It’s too big.
Chef Drone Leader: Wasteful request cannot comply. Alternate suggestion?
Chef Drone #2: Eat the Pancake.
Chef Drone Leader: Boysenberry Syrup?
Johnny: WHAT? It would take a gang of Lumberjacks a week to eat this Pancake.
Dukey: But I’m willing to give it a shot, Johnny.
Lumberjack Leader: Hey, Jacks! You know what I love more than choppin wood?
All: Pancakes!
Dukey: I’ve gotta hand it to those Drones. This meal really is fit for a Lumberjack.
Johnny: Just clean it up and save enough for my Mom… WAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Dukey: Well, look on the bright side. The house is clean.
Johnny: Yeah, but they ATE EVERYTHING! There’s nothing left for Mom.
Lila: What was that? Did they get me an Elephant for my Birthday? An Elephant could be cool. Well, there’s only one way to find out. And that’s… Skylight… and down the roof and…
Susan & Mary: We’re still not ready for you, Mom.
Lila: Man, they are good.
Johnny: All right, Lumberjacks, you’ve had your breakfast. But now, you have to get out of here so I can make some more cause you’re not gonna ruin MY MOM’S BIRTHDAY SURPRISE!
Lumberjack #2: Belly not full. MORE FLAPCAKES!
Johnny: You just ate a Pancake the size of my house!
All: MORE FLAPCAKES!
Dukey: Do what they say, Johnny. They have axes and bushy beards.
Johnny: Then we’ll stuff’em until they can’t take another bite. Drones, more Johnny Cakes. Now!
Chef Drones: (4x) More Johnny Cakes.
Johnny: Hey!
Dukey: I couldn’t help myself. But look.
Lumberjack Leader: Jacks can’t eat another bite.
Johnny: Now, just gotta get rid of them before Dad gets home. Then start cooking for Mom and…
Dukey: Your Dad is home.
Johnny: BAAAAAAAAA
Hugh: Perfume! Women like Perfume, right?
Johnny: Not cheap and stinky Perfume. Don’t go in the house.
Hugh: I’M STILL A HORRIBLE GIFT SHOPPER! This is gonna be your Mom’s worst Birthday ever.
Johnny: Oh, you have no idea. Now go back to the store and buy Mom something that’s not terrible. She likes music. Go get her some music. Bye.
Dukey: THEY’RE GONNA BLOW!
Lila: What was that?
Susan: Stay there. We’ll check it out.
All: JACKS NOT FULL. MORE JOHNNY CAKES!
Both: AAAAA
Johnny: DARN IT!
Chef Drones: (4x) More Johnny Cakes.
Mary: You invited Lumberjacks to Mom’s Birthday Breakfast?!
Susan: And you stole our Constitution Drones?
Chef Drones: (2x) MORE JOHNNY CAKES. MORE JOHNNY…
Dukey: Correction. We destroyed your Construction Drones.
Susan: Well, Mom will certainly be surprised.
Johnny: And it’s all my fault. I shouldn’t have broken into the labs and made the Drone cook for me. But my food crawled away, and I wanted Mom to have The Best Birthday Breakfast ever. Cause she’s amazing and wonderful and I love her so much. And I’m not but a Birthday surprise destroyer, and I ruined everything. And Mom deserves more, because she’s again, amazing and wonderful and I love her.
All: (crying)
Lumberjack Leader: There’s only one thing we Jacks love more than chopping wood and eating Flapcakes, and that’s Mom.
Lumberjack #3: Mom’s are the world’s most valuable resources.
Lumberjack #2: Hello, Mama. I just wanted to say I love you.
All: Jacks wanna help Johnny.
Johnny: Thanks Guys, but it’s too late. There’s no food, no surprise and no way we can pull this off.
Lumberjack Leader: Oh no. It’s time to give Johnny’s Mom the best Birthday Surprise Ever! Jacks, UNITE!
All: YEAH!
Hugh: I got Mom some music. YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Lila: Dad’s screaming, smell burning, wood chopping, I have to know what is going on? I never thought I’d use this. Aha!
All: Happy Birthday, Mom!
Lila: It… It’s the most amazing Birthday Surprise I’ve ever had.
Hugh: WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?
Lila: Just the Best Birthday Present Ever! I really didn’t think you’d get me the dining set.
Hugh: And neither did I but, Happy Birthday, Sweetheart.
Lila: Oh, I have everything a mother could ask for, including Lumberjacks. I don’t know how I’ll come up with a gift idea for our anniversary next month?
Johnny: Um, you might want to ask for some new trees.